On the subject of "catcalling"

With the cost of gasoline climbing daily, I'm making more of an effort than ever to travel from point A to point B under my own human-powered locomotion (namely bicycle or on foot as I have yet to channel my brainpower towards teleporting).

Unfortunately, this resolution towards greener living often leaves me at the mercy of the classier types of the opposite sex who enjoy vocalizing animal sounds and/or pick-up lines out their windows while passing in their automobiles. A sample of the highlights:

• Wolf-howls (apparently I resemble the moon with my winter-whitened skin)
• Woof-woofs
• "Looking hot, Baby" (why yes...as a matter of fact I'm standing directly in the sun waiting to cross the black asphalt streets)
• "Hot mama" (see above but add padded spandex shorts and a bicycle)
• "Yummy yummy" (must've been the unwashed hair pulled haphazardly into a ponytail and Chacos...that's hot stuff)
• You name it...I've probably heard it.

The one-sided exchanges baffle me.

I mean...honestly...what do they think is going to happen? I'm going to stop what I'm doing, run over to their car, and say: "Oh Baby, that's just what I've been wanting to hear. Open the door and take me with you wherever you're going in your rusty jalopy/utility van/large gas-guzzling truck." ???

I mosey on most often annoyed, occasionally laughing, but still an annoyed sort of laugh. It's especially intrusive when I'm trying to have a reflective, prayerful commute.

Dear Average Man-of-the-World...when trying to capture my heart
(or any other woman's on the planet):

I suggest a new strategy.