For my mother...the reader of my blog (and anyone else currently unknown that happens upon my small corner of the interwebs :)

It's hard enough to journal when there's a lot going on...hence the following excerpt from my journal months ago that also applies to this blogging adventure.

"SO long since I've written. Way way waaay too long in fact. After a point though, my mind gets so full that I feel defeated. It's intimidating in that I don't even know where to start. I think sometimes I feel like every time I write, I need to have some deep wisdom or insight."

This feeling is especially poignant when there's the possibility for others to read.

I definitely feel the drive to perform in all my undertakings. I set high expectations of myself, and when I fail to live up to them, I wallow a bit. The longer the wallowing, the greater the humility required to try again. Thankfully, the Lord is growing me in this area.

So here we are, and rather than try to sum up the past year, I'll simply start afresh:

I think about "community" a lot. It's a value integral to my being...to all our beings because the God who created us in His image values community. He himself lives in community: Father, Son, Holy Spirit. I think about living in it, growing it, inviting people into it. The opportunity to know and be known.

It's a beautiful concept. But the practical experience of living in community is full of many challenging situations populated by glorious, life-giving moments where the age-to-come intersects the here-and-now. Exquisite glimpses of God's Kingdom here on earth.

Lately, I've been asking that God would make HIS heart for community more real to me. My head knows a lot of language to use when discussing community, a lot of concepts about what community should look like, and even a lot of what the word has to say about community. I've read numerous books that have spoken to me deeply, challenged me in my life, and inspired me with the possibility of community. And yet, what I actually want is for my heart for community to be more like The Father's heart. To have a deep revelation on the heart level that in turn transforms the rest of me.

I've been enjoying My Sister, My Brother by Henri Nouwen. It's a compilation of excerpts from many of his other writings that share his thoughts on living life together in Christ. I think my plan for the next while will be to blog on specific excerpts from this book that have particularly struck me.

For now, the most common theme that has emerged as I've been praying and asking for wisdom about cultivating unity is my propensity to overcomplicate the things of the Spirit...in this instance: community. I'm being struck over and over again with the simplicity of the call to community.

Love and be loved.

Know and be known.

Seek the heart of Jesus together...

...in whatever way you can, with whomever you can, wherever you can, with The Father's help using whatever gifts and abilities He has given you.

The specifics "whats" and "hows" are so completely secondary to the heart's motivation.